July 2011
3 posts
hello.
welcome to grouchy friday night edition.
my dog is pissed because i put his throw up in the garbage.
i am about to designate this $100 walmart giftcard for ice cream and sour patch children.
i am also actively avoiding wedding planning. you know. for that event that is occurring in two weeks.
June 2011
1 post
Bad bad bad bad bad
Maybe it is finally time to start paying someone to listen/analyze/lecture.
Too. Down. Mondays are bad. Ack.
So what do I do? BLOG.
May 2011
1 post
classic
www.marriedtothesea.com
February 2011
3 posts
Iowa
Is it the Oklahoma of the northern midwest?
I bet I could get into their anatomy program.
I really, really need help sorting out what I’m going to do in the fall. If it’s STAY HERE/WORK HERE I will never forgive myself.
Not a good way to cheer up about upcoming life...
= looking at Costa Rica picturds on my family blog
HOWEVER
Zinfandel + ghosty reading + surprisingly non-shitty calzones + Jeremy reading nearby
= a very decent reprieve
I think one of the more stressful parts of being in a serious relationship is the constant knowledge (and all of the associated, even if misguided, guilt) that your life decisions will very directly impact someone...
Essence, be ye gone
Oh, forgotten blogs.
Don’t worry, nothing nude to say.
Things I’m wishing for: A dog Giant smartees Sleeps Direction
Mostly the first two. Oh, and… Title.
October 2010
7 posts
www.nataliedee.com
True and true
(texties)
Self: I left my phone in the car for 30 minutes, returned to 3 missed [parental] calls and the text, “Please call as soon as you get this!” So I called to see what was wrong. “Oh nothin, just wanted to say hi.”
Self: WHY does this only happen to me and not you?
Brother: Because I’m sassier than you
Confession
In the past month, I’ve gone through and read every post ever on TheBloggess.com
At work, mostly. And for the record, I’ve even been getting shit DONE.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: work needs more whiskey. Or at least headphones, for the sake of sanity.
Because you need to know
This may be the most meaningful thing I’ve ever written.
I was planning on doing the live Twitter thing during Pow Wow because I was there alone and I wanted to feel like I was conversing. But I didn’t get Twitter loaded onto my iPod until after intermission so I made a text document on said iPod filled with things I would have said. This is going to be such a good use of both of our...
ANTSY PEOPLE SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO STAY AT...
I have been at work for about three hours and have completed about ten minutes worth of work. And I feel accomplished. And antsy as fuck.
Remember the phase of my life when I used that non-gender-specific body wash that apparently smelled like cologne, and I got hit on for sure by one female, and possibly by a second (who may have just been being friendly but for people who panic during most...
In case you forgot how classy I am
Today I was down so I left my hair down so I could play with it. Then I realized that down hair not only accentuates the small head problem, but adds a new element, and likewise an uncanny similarity to that which, with great research skills, I’ve narrowed down to that oddly shaped McDonalds character.
This was upsetting until I remembered this, incidentally from one of my favorite sodes
OH FINE
I just typed a few paragraphs but mostly it was self-deprecating and pointless and complainful. WHICH is not unusual for me at all and seems right on par with anything that I produce, written or spoken.
But instead of composing the written out equivalent of that part in Garden State when they yell into the abyss*, I will think about
SOME THINGS I LIKE RIGHT NOW: Black coffee The book I am...
September 2010
4 posts
From an email originally intended for mine...
I just want to throw this out there, to keep the record alive, even though it’s been established a thousand splendid times before:
Reading blog archives is nearly incapacitating.
There was a time when we all lived together, or so near one another, and wrote regardless and commented and had issues to discuss like would you rather have your name be TwinkletwinklelittleParisHilton or Breasty...
The next round's on me!
I just realized what sort of individual I am at work. It really is no wonder that I’m such a solitary worker (meaning: this is why people don’t talk to me).
Imagine a small white box, about the size of a credit card and no taller than The Prisoner of Azkaban is thick. It has a lid but I’m not using it. Instead, a piece of x-ray film (cut to size, with seven air holes poked...
Graduate degrees offered: None in your field
Beer Incompletion Communication Device Destruction (concentration in phones) Discontinued 21st Century Pastimes (concentration in Jetman) Sitting Quietly Undergraduate Bullshitery Underground Journalism at Private Universities
I am confident that I could not only succeed in any of these areas of concentration, but potentially become a leading force in the field.
Gradschools.com is NOT HELPFUL...
where's waldo?
No.
Tonight Jerry and I are playing Find the Naked Woman.
June 2010
2 posts
You know what would make work better?
Drinks.
March 2010
1 post
“I suppose I have a really loose interpretation of ‘work’ because I...”
– Andy Warhol
February 2010
3 posts
carry that weight
Do you ever find a song that is so unbearably perfect and it’s frustrating because, despite best search efforts, you can’t find anything that reaches its quality/depth/art and are forced to listen to it on repeat for as long as you can stand it? I keep listening to this one, and it’s not a sad song but it’s so sadly perfect. So I keep listening and trying to cry.
Anyone...
Another one with which I waste your time
I rarely post in a fully sober state of mind. Today I had to show my boss a project I’ve been working on for three weeks and got nervous about a number of things, specifically two: that he would hate it, and that I was too tired/out of it/bloodshot eyes-having and that would raise suspicion. I feel like he doesn’t need any more reasons to question why he hired me. So I quickly downed...
January 2010
1 post
Sadly, sadly
So The Boy is telling me I should take up beer making, and the battery is dying on this computer, and my nose is nearly numb, so these are hindering factors to this post. Just a warning.
This is just an update of what is up, currently.
1. There are a couple of grad school programs I had my eye on, and with my subpar but still decent GRE scores I was thinking of finally getting the hell out of...
December 2009
1 post
Chapter 24: A Rude Awakening
WHY didn’t anyone tell me I am a bad writer? Why did I have to hear it from the GRE people? It stung.
And I am listening to Bad Romance?
Oh and in the end I made us all hobbits so we could have good drinks and be fat kids with plentiful pipe weed.
November 2009
2 posts
Oh no. I am falling into the trap of thinking that since 1-2 people read what I write on here, instead of 0, it actually matters what I write. Wrong again, self. That is partially why I haven’t been so writey lately. There is not much new on which I can report, currently.
I had a family Thanksgiving in my little apartment. It was not big enough of a deal to talk about, unless I were to...
October 2009
4 posts
What the WHAT
NUDES: I found us a new Jesus Camp. I mean, potentially. I haven’t actually seen it yet but it looks very promising. I will give you a mental picture of the focus of this documentary, as provided to me by an NPR story.
There is a church in Texas that presents a haunted house to the community every Halloween since 1999. Admission is $7, and your ticket will take you through specially...
ERIC CARTMAN
I know I’d only improve your image of me if I admit my strong appreciation for South Park and my tendency to view episodes only in marathon form. I’d blame it on boredom or lack of choices or unemployment depression but we all know it’s fully by choice that I sit down to the magic of endless streaming.
You know, figuring out the HTML to put that link in thoroughly distracted me...
debate
I keep going back and forth between this and Blogger. If the comments work out on this one, I think I’m keeping it. Tumblr looks cooler.
So tell me if the comments work.
GOODBYE MY LOVER
DEFENSE: James Blunt is playing because Roommate texted me about college last night, and it made me think about things of old. So I’ve been listening to the playlist I made that chronicles our years of college in song form. Not like emotional interpretations or reflections but like songs we actually listened to during certain eras. Example: You can track the exact moment of DDS’s...
September 2009
3 posts
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOLLY
Growing up my best friend’s name was Molly. I mean her name is still Molly, we’re just less familiar now. She is three days older than me and today is her birthday and my outlook on life is more grim than I care to discuss publicly, etc etc etc.
According to recent polls, all I ever talk about is alcohol and movies. Classy, huh. To add to the class, I need to report that my only...
JUNKY HAS A NUDE FACE
I just walked a repeated figure eight around the apartment complex, smoking and creepily glancing into people’s apartments. All with a meatless chick’n patty sticking out of my pocket. And when I was done, I came back inside and got mayonnaise in my eye. I am going to go ahead and count this day another success for unemployment.
